


Dave and Klaus Plus Six

by writer_inthe_dark



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, But mostly fluff, Dave (Umbrella Academy) is Alive, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, Kid Fic, M/M, Parent Klaus Hargreeves, Reginald Hargreeves' A+ Parenting, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, kinda!! klaus is an adult but the rest of the siblings are babies lol
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-07
Updated: 2019-12-10
Packaged: 2020-08-11 02:56:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 17,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20146465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writer_inthe_dark/pseuds/writer_inthe_dark
Summary: On April 1st, 2019, forty-two children were born to women who hadn’t been pregnant the day before. Eccentric billionaire Reginald Hargreeves adopted six of them. This didn’t sit well with Klaus.OrKlaus and Dave Katz are happily married when they hear the news that Klaus’ estranged father has suddenly adopted six babies. They decide that Reginald cannot be a father and raise the babies themselves. Chaos ensues.





	1. Breaking News

Klaus heard the front door shut and a voice yell out, “Honey, I’m home!”. He smiled and skipped to the door. His husband Dave was shimmying his shoes off when Klaus leapt into his arms.

“Hey babe,” Klaus beamed before planting a kiss onto Dave’s lips, “missed you.”

Dave grinned, “Missed you more.”

Another kiss, “That’s not even possible.”

Dave laughed and carried Klaus bridal style into the kitchen, coating Klaus’ neck in kisses. Klaus squealed in laughter.

“_Dave!!!_ You know I’m ticklish!”

Dave responded by placing his mouth against Klaus’ neck and blowing, making a ridiculous noise in the process. Klaus yelped, laughing in delight, and jumped out of Dave’s arms. 

Dave hummed, “Alright, alright, no more tickling. I promise. Now, tell me all about your day. I want to hear all about it!”

“Well,” he began, moving to the stove to stir whatever was cooking, “I finished my painting! It only took me forever! I’ll show you after dinner, but I sent a picture of it to Laura and she said that she would put it in the auction if I wanted! Think of all the wealthy bastards that could bid on it. We could get rich!”

Dave picked Klaus up and spun him around in excitement before gently setting him on his feet again, “Oh my gosh, Klaus, that’s so incredible! I’m so proud of you.” 

Klaus blushed and looked down bashfully, “Okay, okay, it's not _that_ big of a deal…”

“Of course it is! I’m so happy for you, babe. Even without ‘rich bastards’ wanting it, I’m just happy you’re doing something you love.”

Klaus felt his heart warm, “Well, okay, I’ve had a good day. What about you, sweetums, how was school?”

“Well, today I had to teach the kids what fractions were and you’d think I was trying to teach them quantum physics or something.” He laughed, “It was a good day, though. You know my class always cracks me up.”

Klaus hummed, “You hungry? I’m making fettuccine alfredo.”

“Sounds delicious.” 

Klaus turned to continue stirring the pasta and Dave planted a kiss into his curly hair. He then turned and set the table. Within minutes Klaus yelled out in a sing-song voice, “Done!” and they began to eat. They talked and talked about everything and nothing at all. They continued to talk about their days, about how Klaus was excited by the potential of his career as an artist, about something silly one of Dave’s students had said, about what they think will happen on tonight’s episode of _The Bachelorette_. Their hearts glowed as they finished eating and settled onto the couch to watch the episode. Dave had rested his head on Klaus’ lap and Klaus was running his fingers through Dave’s hair.

He smiled. He thanked the stars everyday for bringing Dave into his life. He sometimes wonders where he would be right now if he hadn’t met him. Probably dead. Or shooting up in some crack-house. Most likely dead, though. 

It really was a miracle that the two had met in the first place. They had met at a dance bar, one that Dave’s friends had to physically drag him to (he is not a big fan of crowded, trashy bars), and one that Klaus had to sneak past the bouncers to get in to (apparently he had ‘caused a scene’ and ‘puked on the D.J.’ and ‘got caught having sex in the bathroom’ the night before, causing him to be banned from the establishment. Whatever.) 

Dave was hiding out in the bathroom when they met. All of his friends were wasted and he just wanted to go home. It was too crowded, too sweaty, and there wasn’t even good music playing. Just EDM, which he was not a big fan of. He was about to call a taxi home when Klaus stumbled in. Dave looked up in surprise and took in the man before him. He was wearing a pink boa, no shirt, and a checkered print skirt. His hair was all over the place and his pupils were completely blown. Dave was yanked out of his shock when the man slurred out something incoherent and promptly fell into him. 

“Woah!” Dave yelped as he caught the man, “Oh my God! Are you alright?”

“Mmm?” The man grunted and looked at Dave with unseeing eyes.

“Oh, God, I think you need to go to the hospital or something.” Dave was full blown panicking at this point, but Klaus slumped off of him and staggered towards the wall, slurring out a response.

“No, no. I’m jus’ ffffine. I don’ need to go. No, no, noooooo.” He ended with a snort and let the wall keep him standing. Dave had no clue what to do. Should he tell someone who worked here? What if they just dumped him outside and didn’t get him somewhere safe? He should call the guy a taxi.

“Hey,” He tried to get Klaus’ dazed out attention, “What’s your address? I can call you a taxi and make sure you get home okay.”

Klaus snorted again, “Pffffft! I dunno what you’re eeeeeeven talkin’ ‘bout. I live….here!” He began laughing uncontrollably at that. “Don’ live there….I live here! Hahahahaha! I live here!”

Dave sighed, “Look, if you’re so out of it that you can’t even think of your own address, I really feel like I should call an ambulance or something.”

Klaus closed his eyes and pressed his face into Dave’s shoulder and he groaned, “Nooooooooo.” He then lifted his eyes with a dopey grin, “You jus’ don’ understaaaaand, man! I’m livin’ here, I’m livin’ there. Bop bop bop!” He giggled and booped Dave’s nose with each ‘bop’, “But I don’t got a address, c’mon! I’m just rollin’ around!”

Dave tried to make sense of what the man was slurring out, “You mean you’re...homeless?”

Klaus rolled his eyes, “Pffffft. It’s not like _thaaaaat_. I just don’t got one of my own. Get it?”

Dave blinked, “You’re not homeless...you just don’t have a home…?”

Klaus threw his hands in the air, stumbling in the process, “Finally! Yeaaaaaah, you get it! See! It’s all good!”

“Oh.” was all Dave managed to say in response. He had no idea what to do now. He was worried about this man, but didn’t know how to help.

“Where are you going to go after this?”

Klaus swayed, “Hmmmmmm, I dunno. Jus’ gonna find someone and see if they wanna...,” he winked, “Ohhhh you know, haha! That’s usually what I do right about now. People at this bar always wanna!” 

Dave did not want him to go home with some random horny stranger. They could take advantage of him! Actually, anyone who would possibly sleep with this man tonight would _absolutely_ be taking advantage of him. Fuck!

“Hey, you don’t need to do that. I’m about to head home now, you can stay at my place tonight.”

Klaus’ face lit up with a hazy grin and he fell into Dave again. He purred, “Ohhhh, really.” He laughed, “You were asking me questions like you were a cop or sum'n’! I didn’ think you wanted to hook up! Hahaha, I woulda been bein’ a lil’ more flirty-flirty with ya’!”

Dave wrapped an arm around the man to steady him as he started leading him towards the door, “Not to hook up. Just to sleep.”

Klaus laughed again, with Dave practically dragging him out of the bar, “_Sureeeee_. Okay, whatever you say!”

Klaus ended up sleeping at Dave’s that night and woke up with no recollection of the previous night. Dave had awkwardly explained what had happened and had to convince Klaus that they had definitely not hooked up. Klaus was very apologetic, but Dave told him not to worry about it. He told Klaus that if he ever needed a place to crash, he could stay at his place, no strings attached. Klaus was shocked by how completely kind and patient Dave was and did end up coming back. He would always apologize in the morning, but Dave would always assure him that he had no reason to be sorry. They started hanging out more and more, not just when Klaus needed a place to crash, but because they really enjoyed being around each other. Klaus would show up at Dave’s with little gifts, like flowers he picked, or a nice watch he ‘found’, or a sweater he had somehow managed to knit. Dave would bake cookies for whenever he knew Klaus would be stopping by, or get him a new outfit that he thought he would love, or rent a movie because Klaus had offhandedly mentioned that he liked it. They were quickly falling deeper and deeper in love with one another, despite neither saying it out loud.

Then Klaus overdosed.

Dave got a call at four in the morning from the hospital. He was Klaus’ emergency contact. He was told that Klaus had overdosed in an alley and was in critical condition. He had to be resuscitated in the ambulance. Dave rushed to the E.R. in a panic. Klaus was unconscious when he arrived. He sobbed and sobbed and never left Klaus’ side. Klaus woke up two days later and Dave had never been more relieved in his entire life. He hugged him tight, crying and pleading, 

_“Please, please don’t ever do that again. Please don’t leave me. I love you so much. Oh, God, I love you so much, please don’t, please don’t, please don’t.”_

That day, Klaus vowed to get sober. He checked himself into rehab the moment he was allowed to leave the hospital. He lasted the whole thirty days. Dave picked him up and took him back to his apartment. _Their_ apartment. He helped Klaus through it all. He would stay up all night with Klaus, stroking his fingers through his hair, coaxing him when it was all too much. He would be patient with him when the cravings were overwhelming. He would be kind even when Klaus was cranky and jittery and loud. It was hard, but they got through it together.

They got married six months later. It was the happiest day of both of their lives. After Dave proposed, he was stressed and wanted to make their wedding day extravagant, flashy, and exciting. He wanted to give Klaus the perfect day and wanted the wedding to be as extravagant as the man himself. He didn’t want Klaus to have to worry about a thing and was determined to pay for the wedding himself. However, planning an extravagant wedding on a teacher’s salary is not an easy task. He had a rocky relationship with his parents, so he couldn’t ask them for help, and although he knew Klaus’ father was a billionaire, he also knew that he was an abusive piece of shit, so he was out of the question. Klaus discovered Dave’s distress when he glanced over his shoulder to see Dave researching how to sell plasma from your blood. Klaus asked if they were having money problems and whether or not he should ask for more hours at work-he had recently gotten a job as a barista-and Dave had responded in tears, explaining how he wanted to give Klaus the world and wanted their wedding day to be magical, but that he couldn’t afford for it to be everything Klaus deserved. Klaus teared up as he wrapped Dave in a hug, covered his forehead in kisses, and said, “As long as I’m marrying you, it will be the most magical wedding this world has ever seen. We could get married in a fucking port-o-potty and I would cry tears of joy, Dave.”

The next day, they went to a pawn shop and Klaus bought the cheapest dress in the store. It was a wedding dress that must have been made in the 80’s, complete with puffy sleeves and oversized skirts. Dave was about to buy a normal black suit for himself, but changed his mind when he heard Klaus laughing hysterically over a leopard print suit with matching pants. 

They strolled into the courthouse looking absolutely absurd, but neither of them cared. Klaus kept his promise in shedding tears of joy, with Dave following suit. They read each other vows, despite the judge telling them that wasn’t normally how a courthouse wedding operates, they kissed, and Klaus Hargreeves was officially Klaus Katz. 

Five years later and Klaus is still with the man of his dreams, laughing together as some ‘major drama’ goes down on their favorite show. They had bought a house just outside of the city nearly three years ago. It was small, sure, but it was theirs. Klaus had quit his job as a barista about a year ago to focus on his art career after some of his pieces started selling and Dave had completely supported him. He had never felt so loved in his life.

Dave shot up and gasped as their favorite contestant was told to leave the show, yanking Klaus from his thoughts. 

“She’s seriously going to send home _Mike!?_ He’s the best guy there! He better be the next Bachelor or I’ll lose it.” 

Klaus smiled warmly as Dave paced around the room until the episode ended. 

“Hey, just think we’ll get a whole season of Mike if he is the next Bachelor! That would be _so_ amazing.”

Dave sighed and slumped down next to Klaus, “I guess so.”

Klaus snorted and pressed a kiss into Dave’s shoulder before standing up to get some nailpolish. Dave flipped the channel to the news. Before bed every night, Dave would always watch the news while Klaus distracted himself with a book or nailpolish, or simply snuggled against Dave. He would always tease Dave and call him an old man for doing things like watch the news or read the newspaper, but secretly he found it really cute. He plucked a shade of purple polish off their bathroom counter before settling on the ground between Dave’s legs and painting his toes. He loved having his nails painted, especially his toes. It just added a little extra flavor to an otherwise boring area. 

He was adding a second coat to his right foot when he heard Dave gasp behind him. He turned around and raised his eyebrows when he saw Dave’s horrified expression. Dave looked at him, opened his mouth to speak, looked back to the T.V., shut his mouth, then looked back to him. Klaus slowly turned his head towards the T.V.. He felt his entire body go cold and his stomach drop to the floor as he read the headline.

**Billionaire Reginald Hargreeves Adopts Six Infants From Around The World.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok i know i should be working on my other fic but this idea just popped in my head and i couldnt get it out!! I'm really excited about this and hope you guys enjoy it!! also, klaus was still born on oct. 1st 1989, but he is the biological son of r******* h********* and doesnt have powers...that will be clearer in the later chapters but like...in case anyone was wondering lol ANYWAYS i loveeeee reading comments so let me know what you think!!


	2. Family Reunion

He can’t breathe. He can’t breathe. He’s hyperventilating. He’s vaguely aware of someone speaking. Saying his name. Shouting his name. When did he get on the floor? There’s hands against his cheeks. _“Look at me, Klaus.”_ He registers that Dave is kneeling in front of him. How long has he been there? Dave’s speaking again, but he sounds so far away. His hand is being guided to Dave’s chest. Over the sound of his own heartbeat and blood rushing in his ear, he can make out, _“Breathe with me, Klaus. I know you can do it. Just breathe with me. Match my chest. Breathe.”_

After about five minutes, he finally has his breathing under control. He is shaking as Dave wraps him up in his arms. Klaus clings to him like a lifeline as he begins to sob. Dave cradles him, giving comforting words in between soft kisses to the top of his head. They sit there like that for what feels like an eternity, until Klaus is all cried out. When the tears stop, they still don’t get up. 

“He can’t do that.” Klaus whispers.

Dave gently strokes Klaus’ back. “I know,” He whispers.

“He can’t- I don’t- Why w- He can’t.”

“I know.”

They sat like that for hours.

The next morning, Klaus had a headache and puffy eyes from all the crying. Dave called in sick from work, staying home to be there for Klaus. They laid in bed and Dave spooned him, gently rubbing his arm and kissing his neck. 

“I’m here for you for anything you need. You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to, but I’m here.”

Klaus sniffed and snuggled further into Dave. He hadn’t ever fully spoken to Dave about his childhood. He had told him some things, but not everything. Dave knows enough to know that Klaus’ father is an abusive piece of shit. He knows that Klaus ran away at sixteen and that his father only brought him back home because a missing child would be bad press. He found out after Klaus had a particularly bad nightmare that his father used to lock him in a cellar in their basement whenever he didn’t want to deal with him. That he once was locked in it for three days straight. That he always wondered if he would never be let out. That he would scream and scream but no one would come for him.

Klaus had seen a therapist about it at Dave’s suggestion, and it had been really good for him. He saw her once a week for about a year. He told her about his trauma that followed him from childhood. He told her about the abuse. She helped him understand that he didn’t deserve that. That nobody should be treated that way. Sadly, their health insurance policy they had changed to not cover therapy, and they couldn’t pay for it out of pocket, so he stopped seeing her. 

It’s not that he didn’t feel comfortable talking about these things with Dave-he could tell Dave anything. It’s just that he wanted to forget these things. He wanted his life with Dave to be completely free of memories like that. He wanted to move on. Talking to someone completely uninvolved in his life seemed best. He could lay it all out there and move on. And that’s what he did, or so he thought.

He sighed and turned to face his husband, “We have to do something. He can’t have those kids.”

Dave looked at him with those kind, kind eyes, “Okay. Whatever you want to do, we can do. We can call child services, call the police, anything.”

Klaus swallowed, “I don’t know if that’s best...he’s a _billionaire_, Dave. He will just pay them off and make them forget about it. I think…” He took a deep breath, “I think I need to go talk to him.”

Dave was quiet for a moment before nodding, “Okay, I’ll go with you. What...what are you going to say to him?”

Klaus took another shaky breath, “I’ll threaten him. I have...a lot of dirt on him to put it mildly. I’ll say that I’m going to go to the press unless he puts them back up for adoption.”

Dave reached for Klaus’ hand and gave it a squeeze, “We’ll make sure those kids are safe, alright? No matter what.”

Klaus squeezed back, “No matter what.”

Later that day, they made their way to the Hargreeves mansion. Klaus looked up at the building towering above him. He couldn’t do it. He hadn’t seen his father since he was 18 and he didn’t want to now. He had been running from him his whole life. 

But there were six innocent babies inside. He couldn’t just sit around and do nothing. He couldn’t bare it if another child had to go through the childhood he went through, much less six of them. He had to do this. He had to save them.

“Babe? You alright? You’re shaking.”

He turned to see Dave looking at him with his big blue eyes full of concern.

“Oh, yeah, yeah. I’m fine. Just thinking…”

Dave grabbed his hand and stroked his thumb across Klaus’ knuckles.

“I’m going to be with you every step of the way. I won’t let him hurt you, alright?”

“Okay.” Klaus whispered. He took a shuddery breath and knocked on the door. His heart started pounding out of his chest as he heard footsteps come their way. Dave gave his hand a squeeze. The door flew open.

“Master Klaus?” 

Klaus breathed in and quietly said, “Hi Pogo.” 

Pogo looked them over and Klaus shifted on his feet. He had mixed feelings about his childhood butler. Pogo was always kind to him, but he never did anything to try to stop the abuse he experienced. Always watching, never doing.

Pogo cleared his throat, “Come in. Could I get you anything to drink? Any coffee?”

“No, no, we won’t be here long. I just need to talk to dad.”

Pogo looked down, “Very well. Your father is in his office, follow me.”

Dave and Klaus followed Pogo into the house. Klaus shuddered as he crept further and further inside. He felt like he was walking into a nightmare. He grabbed Dave’s hand a little tighter, and he grabbed right back.

“I’m here, Klaus.” Dave whispered.

They made it to Reginald’s office. Pogo glanced at them before quietly knocking on the door. There was a full minute of tense silence before a stern, “Enter.” could be heard.

Klaus couldn’t feel his legs as he walked into the room. His father was sitting there, writing in a sturdy notebook. He didn’t even look up. Klaus felt like his heart was going to jump out of his chest.

There was a thick silence engulfing the room. Klaus could feel his breathing growing quicker and quicker. He shouldn’t be here. He can’t do this. He can’t. He can’t.

“Dad?” he squeaked.

Reginald finally looked up at that. He didn’t say anything though. Just stared at Klaus with his cold, analytical eyes. Klaus swallowed. Reginald set down his pen.

“What are you doing here, boy.”

Klaus took a shallow breath, “I’m...I’m- I-”

“You are wasting my time with your babbling. Speak.”

Dave rubbed his back comfortingly. Right. Okay. He can do this. He can be strong. He took a deep breath.

“I’m here because I can’t let you raise those kids.”

Reginald raised his eyes at that. He looked almost amused, “Oh?”

“Yeah. I can’t. You can’t be a father. That’s not going to happen.”

“Tell me, boy, how do you plan to stop me?”

Klaus shifted on his feet but stayed strong, "I'll go to the press with everything that went on in this house. I have a lot I could tell them, don't you think?" 

Reginald narrowed his eyes, "Do you actually think anyone will believe anything you say about me? You are a drug addict and a disappointment. No journalist will think you have any credibility."

Klaus opened his mouth to speak, but didn't know what to say. Thankfully Dave took over.

"Listen up, asshole. If we go and tell any media outlet just half of the shit you've done, it won't matter whether everyone believes us or not. Enough people will that no one would want you to raise children ever again. Your reputation would be fucked, the stocks for all your businesses will plummet, it will take years to recover. You wanna risk that? Seriously? Why did you even adopt these kids in the first place, you obviously dont give a shit about children?”

Reginald seemed to have only just noticed that Dave was in the room, “These _'children'_ are destined to save the world. I am the only person on this earth capable of helping them reach their full potential.”

Klaus gave a hysterical laugh at that, “I honestly forgot how _absolutely batshit crazy you are!_ What the fuck are you even talking about? Give them back to their parents, put them up for adoption, do _whatever_. Just know that if these kids stay in this house with you I will ruin you.”

Reginald Hargreeves looked to Klaus as if considering him for the first time. He had a thoughtful look on his face. He grunted and looked back down to his notes.

“I _bought_ these children. Do you really think people who would rather have money than their own child would be better suited to raise them than me?”

Klaus didn’t respond so he continued.

“If I put these children up for adoption, they could end up in the foster system, or with a family that is not equipped to handle the...abnormal qualities that these children possess. They will be better off under my watch. I am already putting together training regiments and will be able to test their abilities as soon as possible.”

Dave spoke up, “Abnormal qualities? Training? Abilities? What are you even talking about? These are _babies_. They need to be loved and nurtured. Not whatever you’re planning.”

Reginald still didn’t look up, “I am not getting rid of the children and that is final. Anything you could say to ‘the press’ would be a foolish waste of time.”

Klaus shook his head, “If you don’t want to put them up for adoption, fine. You don’t trust someone else to care for them. _The fact that you even give a shit about that is freaking me out,_ but whatever. But…” He looked to Dave who nodded. Dave knew exactly what he was about to say, and he was somehow okay with it.

“But we aren’t going to let them be with you. Dave and I will raise them. We can be better fathers than you ever were.”

Reginald huffed out what must have been a laugh at that, “You are not capable of making these children reach their potential. I will train them to save the world. You would give up immediately because you are foolish and weak.”

Dave squeezed Klaus’ hand tight, “Let us prove you wrong.”

Reginald looked up and stared at them for several tense moments before he spoke, “Fine. Their powers have not manifested yet, so they are useless to me now, but they will soon. Once they do, you will realize this endeavor was a foolish waste of time and will give them back to me. Only I can prepare them for their destiny.”

Klaus felt a weight lift off his shoulders. Reginald promptly grunted and went back to his scribbling. They took that as their cue to leave. Pogo lead them to the front door.

“I expect you will need time to prepare your home for the children.”

They nodded. Shit. They are going to need so much baby supplies.

“Very well. I will prepare all of the paperwork while you prepare for their arrival. The infants will be here until you are ready.”

Dave and Klaus started walking out the door when they heard Pogo softly call out, “Um, Master Klaus?”

Klaus turned and raised his eyebrows. Pogo swallowed, “I wish you the best of luck. I really do.”

Klaus nodded, took Dave’s hand, and got out of that house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wooooo thanks for reading! I love hearing your thoughts so please leave a comment and let me know what ya think!! :)


	3. Delivery Day

Their minds were racing a mile a minute as they made their way away from the mansion. Dave was the first to speak.

“Well...we did it.” He smiled to Klaus, but Klaus just looked at him and crumpled.

“Dave, oh my god, I’m so sorry. I should have consulted you first before just saying we would take those kids. We don’t have to do this we-”

“Babe. Yes we do. Please don’t feel bad. If you hadn’t said it, I would have. Besides, we’ve always talked about how we wanted to start a family one day. That day is just a bit sooner than we planned.”

Klaus laughed hysterically.

“Yeah, start a family, as in adopt a kid or two. Not a whole herd of babies all at once! Fuck! We aren’t prepared for babies! We need toys and diapers and shit! I don’t know how to change a diaper! Six babies, Dave! Six! Holy Fuck!”

Klaus frantically running his hands through his hair and panicking. Dave grabbed Klaus’ face in his hands.

“Babe, stop freaking out. We can do this. Together we can get through anything. Remember that show _Jon and Kate Plus Eight_? Those assholes had six babies PLUS two toddlers! If they can do it, we definitely can.” He planted a kiss on Klaus’ lips, “You’re going to be a great dad. I know you are.”

Klaus sighed and melted into his arms, “It’s just scary. What if he’s right? What if we can’t do this?”

Dave looked at his husband sternly, “That man hasn’t been right about a single thing in his miserable life. We are going to give those kids the best childhoods this world has ever seen. We are going to make them the happiest kids alive and there is _nothing_ that _Reginald Hargreeves_ can do about it!!”

Klaus smiled. God, he loved Dave so much. Seeing him so passionate about this made his heart swell. This wasn’t a mistake. They can do this.

They rode the bus home, planning what they needed on the way. They would focus on the essentials: diapers, cribs, baby food, and clothes. Wait, how old were these babies? That makes a big difference on the size of the clothes and whether they would need formula or baby food. Were they all boys? All girls? Mix of both? Why didn’t they think to ask? They were so shocked that Reginald agreed that they didn’t think to ask him, and after he sent them away, they just wanted to get out of that house as fast as possible, so questions for Pogo slipped their minds.

“Fuck, I don’t want to call him.”

“I can call if you don’t want to talk to them.”

“No, Dave. I bet they already forgot who you are by now...No offence.”

“None taken.”

Klaus groaned and pulled out his phone. Pogo answered with a “Hargreeves residence, this is Pogo.” They talked for only about two minutes before Klaus blurted, “Okay, bye!” and hung up.

“Okay, here’s the scoop: six babies; two girls and four boys. All three months old and born on April Fool’s Day. Ha! That’s cute.”

“Three months old. Okay. That would be...formula, right?”

Klaus looked at him blankly, “Uhh, hang on.”

He googled, ‘what do 3 month olds eat’

…

“Yes! Formula! In a month we can start giving them solid foods, but for now it's strictly formula.”

“Look up other stuff we need.”

…

Their list grew longer at that. They would need baby shampoo and body wash, baby wipes, baby powder, towels, a diaper bag, a changing table, a baby carrier, the list went on and on. They could hear their wallets crying with each item added to the list. They were honestly thankful that neither of them owned a car so they didn’t have to get six car seats, but how would they go anywhere with their kids? Fuck! 

“Okay, okay, it’s not so bad. We can hit up Goodwill or something for a lot of this stuff. And I bet we could find all of the toiletries at a dollar store. It won’t be too bad.”

“If we get them dollar store diapers, they will all get rashes! It actually matters whether that stuff is cheap or not, Dave!”

“Well, I don’t know. I’m just trying to think of ideas here!”

“Ughhhhhh.” 

They ended up going to Target for diapers, baby wipes, shampoo, etc, and shockingly found all of the rest of the things they needed at Goodwill, including six cribs (_“Jesus Christ, where are we going to put all of those?”_). They ended up having to make multiple trips home, ordering 3 seperate Uber XL’s in the process. They had two extra bedrooms in the house, however, one was currently being used as Klaus' art studio and the other was filled to the brim with all of the books Dave owned. They ended up cramming everything from those rooms into their own bedroom, leaving little room to move. After that, they were able to put three cribs in each spare bedroom. By the time they had set everything up, it was already night time. They showered and cuddled into bed, exhausted. Dave ran his fingers through Klaus’ curls while Klaus snuggled into his chest.

“We are going to be _parents_, Klaus. I can’t believe it. Actual parents.”

Klaus looked up at him and they both smiled at each other, “Does this make us DILFs?”

Dave laughed, “Absolutely.”

They drifted off into a peaceful sleep.

The next morning, Klaus was frantically trying to baby-proof the house.

“Can babies climb? We should hide the knives. I’m going to vacuum the whole house now. Can you make sure all of our bookshelves and things are secure? They can’t crawl yet, but they will soon and I don’t want anything falling on them. Thank Christ we don’t have stairs in this house. Dave, could you imagine? They could fall down them! Dave!”

By the afternoon, they were as ready as they ever could be. Klaus made the call to Pogo to bring the kids over to their house, telling him the address. He was jittery with excitement. They were about to meet their _kids_! Their very own kids! They were going to be parents. He looked over and saw Dave tearing up.

“I’m just so happy.” He said while wiping his eyes. Klaus smiled and kissed him.

“Me too, honey. Our kids are coming home!”

They were giggling excitedly when they heard a car pull into their front driveway. They walked out to see a large van parked in front of their house. Pogo waved at them from the front seat. He seemed genuinely happy. Klaus and Dave walked over to the car and Pogo got out and opened the door to the backseat, revealing six precious little babies waiting for them. The Katzes both gasped. They were the cutest babies they had ever seen. Most were asleep, but two were looking at them with wide and curious eyes. One made a soft cooing noise, causing Klaus to literally burst into tears. 

“They are so small, I- I- Oh my god!” 

Tears were streaming down Dave’s face now too. They wrapped their arms around each other tightly, all while not taking their eyes away from their kids. 

Pogo cleared his throat, “Shall we begin bringing them inside?”

Pogo decided to stand watch by the van while Klaus and Dave brought the kids inside. He explained that it was the kids' nap time, so they should probably just set the children in their cribs for now. Klaus reached in and carefully unbuckled the baby closest to him. The baby was snoozing happily, with dirty blonde hair in patches over his little head. He was a chunky little thing. Klaus slowly adjusted him so that he would be lying peacefully in his arms. Dave reached in next, pulling out a small baby boy with light brown skin. When Dave started to pick him up, he started squirming, unhappy to be distirbed from his nap. Dave shushed him comfortingly and placed a light kiss on his soft forehead. He instantly stopped wriggling and made a pleasant sound, falling back asleep. Klaus and Dave beamed at each other and carried the boys inside. 

The bedrooms were directly across the hall from each other, so if you were standing in the hall between them, you could perfectly see everyone inside both. They went into opposite bedrooms and gently placed the babies in cribs. They both took a second to look at the child below them sleeping peacefully. They sighed deeply, met each other in the hall, then set out for the next set of babies. 

Dave made it to the car first this time and reached in for the precious little baby girl in front of him. She already had a thick head of hair that came out in small ringlets. She nuzzled into his chest sleepily as he held her in his arms. The baby Klaus grabbed next was one of the ones that was awake when they arrived. He was extremely tiny and looked at Klaus with curious hazel eyes. As Klaus drew closer, the baby remained silent but reached his arms out eagerly to him. Klaus smiled and resisted the urge to start crying from another cuteness overload. 

They settled these babies inside and set out for the next pair. The next baby was the other one that was already awake. He was still making happy cooing noises and wriggling excitedly as Dave scooped him up into his arms. Dave giggled and kissed him on his chubby little cheek. The final baby was the smallest of all. She was pale, scrawny, and completely bald. Klaus carefully unbuckled her and scooped her up, but she woke up and began to cry. Klaus patted her head and bounced around, speaking gently to reassure her, “Shh, shh, it’s okay. I promise I didn’t mean to wake you. It’s okay.”

Pogo shut the car door and spoke softly, “She’s quite the fussy little one. We’ve found that music seems to calm her down.”

Klaus considered this, then began to hum _Here Comes the Sun_. Pogo smiled to himself and followed them inside. By the time they had gotten to the bedrooms, the little girl had quieted and was starting to doze off. They set the babies into cribs. They stood back and simply stared at them all. They were all so beautiful. 

“What are their names?” Klaus asked Pogo. If Klaus or Dave had pried their eyes off of their precious children to look at Pogo as he responded, they would have noticed how his eyes fell to the floor and how he shifted from foot to foot.

“Sir Reginald named them after the order he that acquired them.”

The men were too preoccupied with making silly faces at the babies that were awake to fully process what Pogo had said.

“What do you mean?” Dave asked, just after tickling the baby’s belly in front of him and giggling as the child smiled.

“Well, this child here,” he gestured to the chubby blonde baby, “is named Number One Hargreeves. This here,” he pointed to where the dark skinned baby with ringlets slept, “is Number Three. This-”

“Wait, wait, wait,” Klaus interrupted, “Are you seriously telling me that he didn’t even give them _names_?”

Pogo sighed, “Unfortunately, that is correct.”

Dave scoffed and Klaus ran a hand through his hair muttering, “Jesus Christ.”

Pogo glanced up at them hopefully, “Perhaps...now that they are in your care, this will no longer be the case?”

“You got that right.” replied Dave.

Pogo nodded with a small smile, “Very well.” He pulled out a big folder, “This has all of the paperwork you will need to become their legal guardians for the time being. If you have any questions, do not hesitate to call.”

He took one final glance at the children around him. He smiled fondly and looked Klaus cautiously in the eye before softly saying, “Thank you, Master Klaus.” 

Klaus blinked in surprise and Pogo shuffled out of the house.

Dave hugged Klaus from behind and Klaus leaned back into him.

"We're _dads_, Klaus."

Klaus smiled and looked at his family around him.

"We really are."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BABY TIME!!!!!!!!!! I am so excited haahahah thank you so much for reading!! Let me know what you think!! I love your comments so much!!


	4. The Calm Before the Storm

Names. How to name your kids. It was a big decision with many factors. Dave and Klaus were looking through all of the files that Pogo had given them and were able to find out where each child was born. They decided to give the children names that were reminiscent of where they were born.

The first baby, the one with tufts of blonde hair, was born in a small village in England. After much deliberation, they settled on the name Luther (“Luther? Seriously?” “Oh, come on. Just look at him. He _totally_ looks like a Luther.” “...Okay, yeah.”)

They named the next baby Diego. He was born in Mexico City. Diego had woken up while they were deciding on a name for him and began babbling and squirming, so Dave had picked him up and began playing peek-a-boo, causing Diego to squeal in excitement.

Next was the curly haired girl. She was born in Marseilles, France. They had a hard time agreeing on a name for her (“Eloise?” “Hmmmm she doesn’t seem like an Eloise.” “Fleur?” “Hmmm no.” “Vivienne?” “Not vibing with it.”). They eventually chose Allison.

The next child was born in Rome. He had _finally_ fallen asleep by now and they watched him as they discussed what he should be called. They watched as his chest calmly rose and fell as he slept peacefully. They felt the name Fiero suited him best.

The next baby was still awake and smiling at them. Klaus had picked him up and was cuddling with him during the discussion. He was born in a small fishing town in Rhode Island. Dave was stroking his soft hair with one hand while still cradling Diego with the other. 

“Can we name him Ben?” Dave asked quietly.

Klaus looked at him and pressed a comforting kiss into his shoulder. Dave had a younger brother named Ben, but he had died in a car accident when they were teens. His family hadn’t been the same since.

“Of course.”

Ben seemed to appreciate that and made happy cooing noises at them in response. Dave quickly wiped his eyes.

The final child was born in Saint Petersburg, Russia. They pressed a kiss into her bald little head as she started to stir. They named her Vanya. It felt fitting. 

More and more of the babies began to wake from their naps, evidently hungry. Dave and Klaus prepared bottles for them and began to feed them, all while watching youtube videos on how to raise a three month old baby. 

“They eat five to six times _a day?_ Why do they need to eat that much? How can someone so small consume so much?” Klaus exclaimed while trying to feed Diego the bottle. 

Dave looked up from where he was somehow managing to feed both Allison and Fiero at the same time, “They need it to grow big and strong.” He looked back down to his kids and started baby talking, “Don’t you? Yes you do! My healthy little babies!”

Klaus smiled warmly at the sight. Feeding all of the babies took quite a long time, and after that came diaper changes, which also took up a good bit of their afternoon. After all of the babies were fed and cleaned, the men just gathered them all up and snuggled. They sat on the floor in front of their couch, each in loose criss-cross-applesauce positions with one baby propped up in the crook of each knee and one in the center. After that, they took turns talking to all of the babies about themselves. About how they were their new dads, about how excited they were to be with them, about how they loved them with all of their hearts. The babies all just stared at them in wonder. They occasionally made sweet small noises at them and smiled.

They picked up the babies, with one in each arm and one in a baby carrier on their chests, and took them on a tour of their house. They told the babies which rooms where theirs, what happens in a kitchen, about the living room. They knew the babies couldn’t understand them, but they all seemed to enjoy it and Dave and Klaus loved it too. 

Soon it was time for the dads to eat dinner. They quickly heated up a frozen pizza and ate on the floor, surrounded by their children. After that, they fed and changed the kids again.

“This day went by so fast.” Klaus commented, noticing the sun setting outside.

Dave also looked towards the horizon.

“Wanna go outside?”

They laid out a few blankets and gently set all of the children on them, with room for Dave and Klaus to be in the middle. The children were looking around in awe at the sights around them. Lightning bugs were starting to come out and they looked magical. Fiero started squealing excitedly as one landed on his chest. Both Klaus and Dave looked over at him happily. Dave noticed that there was also a lightning bug in Klaus’ hair and gently untangled it. They looked into each others’ eyes and felt their hearts glow.

The stars started coming out. Luther was wiggling around in excitement, eyes full of wonder as he looked up towards the heavens. Diego and Vanya had both fallen asleep, with Ben dozing in and out. Allison was contentedly chewing on her fingers. Fiero was blinking, curiously taking in the world around him. They were all at peace.

Klaus looked over at Dave, whose eyes crinkled as he fondly looked at the babies around them. Klaus reached over and grabbed his hand. Dave looked back at him and smiled wide. Dave squeezed his hand and he squeezed back. They both then turned their heads back to the stars and sat in harmony.

As they got into bed that night, they were beaming with happiness. They had successfully completed their first day as parents. The kids were all sleeping like logs. Everything had gone smoothly. As they both drifted asleep, they had one optimistic question on their minds.

Is it really going to be this easy?

They got their answer soon enough, and it was a roaring _no_. They were awoken at around 3 a.m. to a chorus of cries. All of the babies wanted to be fed, and after they were fed, they were changed. This took far too long in Dave and Klaus’ opinion, but it needed to be done so that’s what they did. They fell asleep the minute their heads hit the pillow after that. When they opened them again, it felt like only a minute had passed, but it was light out and time to start their morning. The day was complete chaos. It seemed like once they got one baby to stop crying, another would start. The day was a constant cycle of feeding and changing and feeding and changing. By the time they went to bed that night, they felt like their day had lasted ten years. 

The night was no less stressful. They had barely been asleep when Ben woke up crying with an upset stomach. Once he was settled down, Vanya started crying because her diaper was full. They only slept for a few more hours before Luther woke up hungry. By the time morning came round, they were twitching with exhaustion. 

Their weekend cycled through like this, and by the time Monday morning came around, they were practically zombies. Dave was frantically trying to help Klaus get all of the babies fed before he had to leave for work. The school offered absolutely no paternity leave, which they both found atrocious, and Dave was incredibly reluctant to leave. 

“Are you sure you don’t want me to stay? I can make up something! I’ll tell everyone that my mom died or something! _That_ would get me a good amount of time off.”

Klaus laughed as he finished mixing another bottle, “Babe, don’t do that. I’ll be fine. Trust me. If I absolutely need you, I’ll call, alright?”

Dave bit his lip, “Okay...but please promise that you actually will call if you need me. Even with two of us, this is a lot, so if you get overwhelmed, I would understand.”

Klaus pressed a quick kiss to Dave’s lips, “I promise. Now come on, you’re going to be late!”

The week was...stressful to say the least. Things were _much_ harder with just one person around. The feeding and changing now took twice as long as before. It felt like Klaus never got a second to just breathe throughout the daytime.

Whenever Dave would get home, he would wrap Klaus in a bear hug, give him a smooch, and tell him to get in the bath and relax. Klaus would get a moment to chill out while Dave cooked and took care of the little ones. He could always tell when Klaus needed some alone time. 

Things came to a head the following Tuesday evening. The house was in _chaos_. They had ran out of formula. They had stocked up last Wednesday, but they just go through so _many_ and neither of them noticed that they were running low and now they were _out_. Dave had ran to the store to get some more while Klaus frantically tried to soothe all of the children. He was so far, not very successful. Currently, five out of six babies were screaming. He had put on music in an attempt to calm Vanya. He had swaddled Ben in an attempt to calm him down, something that he usually loved. He had Fiero strapped in to the baby carrier on his chest, which would usually make him glow with happiness. Nothing was working. All they wanted was to be fed and they would not calm down until that happened. 

Klaus was practically pulling his hair out when the phone started ringing.

“Dave? Please say that you are almost home.”

Dave sounded panicked when he breathed in at that, “K-Klaus?”

Shit was Dave crying?

“I’m here honey, what’s wrong?”

“Fuck. I don’t know what to do. Our credit card just got declined. I can’t- I don’t know what to do. _Fuck!_” 

Klaus could feel panic rising within him, “_Declined?_ How could it possibly be declined? I _know_ we have money in our account.”

There was a silence on the other end of the line. All Klaus could hear was the babies screaming on his end and quick breaths on Dave’s. Fuck.

“Babe I don’t think we do.”

_Shit shit shit shit_. He’s right. He knows Dave’s right. Klaus just doesn’t want to admit it. They’ve barely had these kids for a _week_ and now they were out of money. _Fuck fuck fuck fu_-

“Okay,” Klaus began pulling at his hair and pacing, with Fiero still on his chest crying. Luther had _somehow_ managed to stay asleep, but the rest of the children were screaming like banshees, and it was doing nothing to make Klaus less stressed. It almost sounded like the crying had gotten louder as Klaus had gotten more panicked. “Okay, we can fix this. We can do this. Can you go to a different store and look for cheaper formula? I bet we still have a few dollars in our account. You’re probably getting declined because we can’t pay full price. Yeah. I bet we can still get something cheaper.” He honestly sounded like he was trying to assure himself. The noise in the room grew louder. Was the music in the room getting louder too? 

There was a tense pause on the other line.

“This is the third store I’ve tried.”

“_FUCK!_” Klaus exclaimed. Right after he yelled, the sound in the room seemed to grow for a single moment, and the lightbulb in the lamp near him burst. He cursed and jumped back. 

“_Holy shit!_” The noise in the room settled after the burst. The children were still crying, except for Vanya who was blinking around, looking surprised.

“Klaus? Are you alright? What the hell just happened?”

“I don’t know! Things are very chaotic over here, Dave! The babies are crying, our lamp just exploded, I’m freaking out! Shit! Forget about it, we gotta figure this out.”

“Right, sorry, okay.”

“Let’s sell the T.V.”

“What?”

“Come pick up the T.V. and sell it to a pawn shop or something. We need cash quick and that’s how we can get it.”

“Okay, okay, you’re right. I’m coming.”

Dave quickly rushed home and sold the T.V. They got enough cash to get formula for the rest of the week, which would last until Dave’s next paycheck. They started preparing the bottles for the babies. Klaus was anxiously tapping his feet and chewing on his nails the entire time. Dave glanced at him in concern.

“Babe? You need a breather?”

Klaus shook his head, “I’m fine, I’m fine, don’t worry about me.”

He must not have been very convincing because Dave only furrowed his brows further, “You need a break. I can get everything under control here. Why don’t you take a walk or something to get your mind off things?”

Klaus ran a hand down his face and agreed. He ended up walking to Griddy’s, a diner that was about a twenty minute walk away. He slumped into a booth and held his head in his hands. He heard light footsteps approaching, then a small voice say, “Klaus? Sweety? You alright?”

He looked up to see Agnes standing above him looking incredibly concerned. Klaus had been coming to this diner since he was a little kid and Agnes had been here the entire time. They had grown close over the years. Agnes would always give him free food whenever he came in.

“Yeah, I’ve just...had a long week, I guess.”

She looked at him sympathetically and poured him a cup of coffee, “Tell me all about it.”

And he did. He told her everything. He told her about his dad adopting the babies. About his confrontation with him. About he and Dave now adopting the kids. About how he loved them more than anything but he was just _so damn tired._

She nodded along and gave him sympathetic pats whenever necessary. Klaus felt the tension lifting from his shoulders as he kept talking to her. When he was done, she squeezed his hand before beginning to speak, “Well, I think you are very brave, Klaus. It’s obvious that you love those kids very much. They are lucky to have you.”

Klaus laughed without any humor, “I’m not sure if lucky is the word I’d use. I don’t even know if Dave and I are going to be able to keep this going. We are literally running out of money. How are we supposed to help these babies grow up and be happy if we can’t even provide for their basic needs? God, I don’t know if this is right or not.”

“Hey now!” Agnes scolded, “Don’t you say that! You are giving these kids the world compared to what they would have had under Reginald Hargreeves’s care, because you are giving them love! You seem like an incredible dad, Klaus. Don’t sell yourself short. Six babies is enough to wear anyone thin. You just need some help.”

She paused, looking thoughtful, then continued, “I work nights, why don’t I swing by during the day to help out? I know that you’re an artist, but I bet you haven’t had the time to paint with everything going on, right?” Klaus nodded, “That’s what I thought. I’ll come by during the day and take care of the babies while you work. That way you get a break and you can work on your paintings to make more money for your family.”

Klaus bit his lip, “Thanks, Agnes, but I can’t ask you to do that.”

She smiled sweetly, “Nonsense! I get bored during the day anyway. Now I’ll have something to do!”

Klaus smiled. Agnes was too sweet for her own good. But he did think that she gets lonely during the day…

“Fine. Only if you want to though. I don’t want you to come over just because you feel obligated or something.”

She tisked and ruffled his hair. She sent him home with a dozen donuts for him and Dave to share. Klaus smiled and looked forward to seeing the bright faces of his babies when he got home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woohoo! sorry for making our boys so stressed this chapter!! things will get better i swear! i promise the upcoming chapters will have more sweet happy times! thanks so much for reading!!


	5. 'Abnormal Qualities'

Klaus groaned as he heard crying in the house. He blearily looked at the clock near his bed. 4:23 a.m. He groaned again, even more exasperated. It was his turn to help the little ones. Him and Dave had decided that they should start taking turns when the babies cry in the night, because both of them getting up together every time was causing neither of them to get any sleep. Even with taking turns, it was still increasingly hard to stay awake during the day. Coffee and energy drinks had become their best friends.

Klaus shuffled out of bed and followed the sound of the crying. It was coming from Fiero, Ben, and Vanya’s room. He rubbed his eyes and entered to see Ben crying and squirming uncomfortably. Even though Klaus was unhappy to be woken up, he still felt a pang in his chest at the sight of his baby hurting. Ben had been having stomach aches lately that seemed to cause him a lot of pain. They had gone to a doctor to see if he could be allergic to the formula they were giving him, but the doctor couldn’t find anything wrong. 

Klaus scooped him up and carried him to the living room so none of the other children would wake. He layed Ben on the couch and began rubbing his belly soothingly and hushing reassuring words to him.

“It’s okay, little Benny. It’s okay.” 

As Klaus kept rubbing soothingly, he felt Ben’s stomach start rumbling beneath him. Maybe he has gas? Klaus put Ben on his shoulder and began to bob around. He was patting his back rhythmically to try to burp him.

“I got you, Benny. You’ll feel better soon.”

He heard Ben’s stomach rumbling, louder this time. He continued patting his back, thinking Ben was almost done. He stifled a yawn. God, he was so tired. He sat down while still burping Ben. He felt his eyes drooping. _Stay awake! Ben needs you!_ He cleared his throat, trying to wake himself up. 

“Sorry, Ben. I’m still here.” 

Pat. Pat. Pat. Ben was still crying. Was it not gas? Maybe he wasn’t patting him right. He yawned and changed the pace. Klaus’ eyes were falling shut. He didn’t realize that he was falling asleep until Ben’s stomach rumbled again, jolting him awake. He paused his pats to smack his face in an attempt to be more awake. It didn’t work. 

He resumed his patting yet again. Poor Ben. He was in so much pain that he couldn’t sleep and Klaus couldn’t even keep his eyes open to help him. He felt like a terrible father. He stood up and started walking around. He can stay awake. He can do this. He doesn’t need sleep. He won’t drift off if he is standing up, right?

Wrong. After about ten minutes of walking around, trying to soothe Ben, he didn’t even notice his eyes sliding shut again. He was standing still, holding Ben on his shoulder, eyes closed. He was not asleep, but he wasn’t quite awake either. He was faintly aware of the sound of Ben’s crying. His stomach rumbled. Was it louder this time? The sound barely registered to him. Each breath of his was coming out deeper and deeper. He vaguely felt something wrapping around his arm and shoulder. Was he dreaming? He was drifting now, barely on the brink of consciousness. The thing on his shoulder wrapped tighter. It felt...slimy. What was on his shoulder? He breathed. Oh, yeah, he was with Ben. _Wait, he was holding Ben!_

He ripped his eyes open and was happy to see Ben still on his shoulder, no longer crying. Instead, he was happy and smiley. Klaus sighed with relief. He could have dropped him! He kissed the top of Ben’s head, but paused when he felt something moist clinging to his arm below Ben. He blearily looked around the baby in his arms and-

He literally started screaming. There were tentacles coming out of his baby and wrapping themselves around his bicep. 

_What the fuck. What the fuck. What the fuck. What-_

He just now realized that he had let go of Ben in his panic and Ben was clinging to him with the tentacles. _FUCK! HE COULD HAVE DROPPED HIS BABY!! _

He was nearly hyperventilating as he cautiously wrapped his arms around his baby and _THERE ARE TENTACLES COMING OUT OF MY BABY WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK-_

Dave burst into the room carrying a baseball bat and looking incredibly disheveled. He stumbled in yelling, _“Klaus what’s hap-”_ before freezing and blinking at the sight before him. His mouth opened and closed like a fish gasping for air for several moments before he finally yelled, 

“WHAT THE FUCK!”

“I DON’T KNOW.”

“WHAT IS THAT?”

“I DON’T KNOW.”

Dave ran over and frantically tried to unwrap the tentacles from Klaus’ arm. Klaus was trying to control his breathing. All of the screaming had caused Ben to start crying again, which seemed to make the tentacles wrap even tighter. 

_“These things are starting to hurt, Dave, what the hell do we do?!”_

_“I don’t know babe, I’m trying my best. Oh god oh god oh god.”_

As Dave worked on loosening the tentacles, Klaus was pressing reassuring kisses to the top of Ben’s head, attempting to sound calm as he said, “Don’t worry, Benny. You’re dads are here. We are going to keep you safe. It’s okay.”

They realized that the more he calmed Ben down, the looser the tentacles’ grip became. They devoted all of their attention into comforting him, planting kisses onto his forehead and cheeks, and softly giving reassurance to him. As they did this, the tentacles slowly started retreating into Ben’s stomach. They vanished with a light sealing noise, and Ben was asleep.

Dave and Klaus stood frozen, staring at Ben. Klaus was holding him like he was a bomb. Neither of them moved.

“What do we do?” Dave whispered.

“I don’t know.” Klaus whispered back.

They eventually layed Benny on the floor in front of the couch and slowly sank into the cushions. They were faintly aware of the sound of the rest of the children crying now, likely awoken by all of the commotion, but they were too shell shocked to react. They were just staring widely at their baby sleeping peacefully in front of them.

“What do you think that was?” Klaus asked in a hollow voice. He tried to ignore the moist feeling still present on his arm.

“I don’t know,” Dave hushed, “Could it have been...a parasite or something?”

“I have never heard of a parasite doing _that._” replied Klaus.

They sat in silence again.

“Well…” Dave began before shaking his head dismissively and going quiet.

“What?”

“It’s just...Reginald did say that these kids had, uh, special abilities...right? Maybe...this is what he was talking about?”

“So you think all of our babies are about to start sprouting tentacles because Reginald thought they were magical or something?”

“I don’t know, it’s just...he kept saying,” He put on an impression of Reginald that managed to make Klaus giggle despite everything, “Only _I_, the _great_ Reginald Hargreeves, am capable of raising these children to save the world! I will train their abilities and make them great!” He laughed slightly, but then continued, “What if he was right about the powers thing? Maybe they can do stuff like that.”

Klaus considered this, “I guess it’s...possible. It would explain the tentacle thing that just came out of our son.”

Dave sighed, “Do you think they all have tentacle thingies that are waiting to sprout out of them?”

Klaus sighed as well, “Who knows,” he looked at Ben, still sleeping peacefully with a little smile on his face, “I guess we better be ready for anything.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol thanks for reading! comment what ya think!


	6. The Next Michelangelo

A month went by with no signs of any more...tentacles. The men kept a sharp eye out for anything unusual, but so far, nothing seemed to be amiss. The children were starting to make proper babbling noises now, instead of the soft cooing noises from before. They were growing up before their eyes.

Klaus was currently running around the house like a madman, trying to get ready. The big art auction was tonight. The one where all of the ‘rich bastards’ will be bidding large sums of money on distinguished art pieces. Klaus had managed to finish four paintings that will be up for grabs. All of them had been approved by the art distributor, Laura, beforehand. She is actually the person who discovered his work. He was working as a barista and the owner of the coffee shop had bought a few pieces from him to hang around the cafe. Laura had come in for a latte and was immediately drawn to the paintings, demanding to know the artist. And thus, Klaus’ dream career had started to blossom.

Dave, Agnes, and all of the kids were attending the event as well. They had managed to get two strollers made for triplets so that they could take all of the babies to the event. They had dressed the children in little baby suits and dresses. Everyone looked as dapper as can be.

The auction was being held at the Icarus Theater. Before the event, all of the paintings for sale were on display in the lobby, so that potential bidders could scope out the art. The artists were supposed to just let people look without interruption, so they couldn’t linger by their own work. Klaus and the squad just made a loop around the lobby, looking at all of the other pieces up for bid. Fiero and Luther especially loved looking around at everything. Diego and Ben were asleep. Allison and Vanya were babbling to each other, almost as if they were having a conversation. 

Once it came time for the auction to begin, the group all huddled together in the back of the auditorium. Dave picked up a crying Vanya to comfort her. Klaus fidgeted anxiously. He picked up Allison and started swirling her around as she laughed giddily. Her smile helped calm some of his nerves. Agnes was squatting in front of the strollers talking very gently to the crowd of babies. 

“Sweetheart?” Dave asked. Klaus turned from where he was twitching to look at him. “I know you’re nervous, but I swear, they will love your art. And if they don’t?” He covered little Vanya’s ears and stage-whispered, “Then fuck ‘em. They have no taste if they can’t see that you are the next Michelangelo.”

Klaus fondly rolled his eyes. “Okay, I know for a fact that that’s not true. And think of how embarrassing it will be if no one wants my paintings! The announcer will be all like, _‘And this is an original by Klaus Katz! Let’s start the bidding at $50!’_ And there will be just completely painful silence! And then we will have to go through that three more times!!”

Dave looked at him sternly, “That’s not gonna happen.”

“But what if it does!”

Dave rolled his eyes as if he couldn’t believe how ridiculous Klaus was being, “I’ll tell you what, if it’s your painting and nobody bids on it, I will. They are beautiful paintings and they would look great around our house.”

Klaus groaned and buried his face against Allison’s shoulder, who decided to hug his head, “_Daveee_. The whole point of selling my paintings is that we are supposed to be _making_ money! Not losing it!”

Dave shrugged, “That’s why I’m not gonna have to. Someone will want them.”

Klaus just groaned again. At that, the lights went down, except for a spotlight at the center of the stage. Klaus could feel his heart beating out of his chest. It felt like an eternity had passed before they presented one of his paintings. 

“And now we have a Klaus Katz original! Let’s start the bidding at $100!”

Klaus braced himself for silence but got none. He blinked as he heard the announcer continue.

“We got $100, now can we get $200? Okay, $200. Now can we get $500? $500. Now can I get $1,000? Okay-”

Klaus couldn’t believe his ears. People kept bidding and bidding. He was gasping at each increase. Dave was laughing happily, “I told you, babe! You’re incredible!” Even the babies seemed to sense the excitement. They were all squealing happily and enthusiastically babbling. Klaus nearly fainted by the time the first painting finally sold. It went for $8,200. The next painting went for $7,900 and the one after that went for $10,400. His final painting went for _$15,500._

“Oh my god.” Klaus was in awe.

“...Wow.” Dave seemed to be in a similar level of shock.

“Yeah.”

“That’s...a lot.”

They looked at each other and slowly broke into a wide grin.

“That’s a _ton!_ Oh my god!”

“It’s because you’re a genius, babe! You’re the best artist this world has ever seen!”

Klaus rolled his eyes but was beaming with pride. Agnes gave him a big hug and they all celebrated to themselves. Once the auction concluded, they were all still brimming with happiness. They were grouped up together when Laura came rushing up to them, “Klaus! I am so proud of you!”

She gave him a big hug before she continued, “Okay, so I have some interesting news. All of your paintings ended up being sold to the same bidder.”

“...What?”

“Yeah, he must have really loved your work! Anyways, he asked to meet you. Is it alright if I bring him over?”

“Of course!” Klaus exclaimed. One man buying every single one of his paintings? Who could this guy be? Allison was grabbing his chin when Laura came back with a man walking with her. Klaus was surprised at his appearance. He pictured the type of person who would come to these things to be fairly old and extravagant. But this man was young, early thirties, with a well kept beard and a simple suit. 

“Hazel, this is the artist, Klaus Katz.” Laura announced. Hazel shuffled forward. He had a small smile on his face as he looked over the group in front of him. He extended his hand to Klaus.

“Nice to meet you, Klaus. My name is Hazel Brown.” Klaus shifted to hold Allison in one arm to shake Hazel’s hand.

“Wow, it’s so nice to meet you Hazel-er, I mean- Mr. Brown.” He nervously rambled out. Hazel just smirked.

“Just Hazel is fine.” He looked over everyone again, taking in the scene, “Quite a big group you’ve got here.”

“Oh!” Klaus exclaimed, “Right, sorry, this is my husband Dave,” Dave jumped forward to shake Hazel’s hand. “This is Agnes,” She gave a shy smile and a soft hello, to which Hazel had a twinkle in his eye. “And these are all of our kids!” And as if Allison heard what he said, she reached for Hazel with grabby hands and made happy babbling noises. Hazel smiled in return.

“All of them are yours?”

Klaus laughed, “Yeah, me and Dave’s. We adopted them all about a month ago...it’s kinda a long story as to why we adopted them all at once but…”

Hazel chuckled a bit, “I see,” He turned to Agnes, “And who would you be in all this?”

Agnes flushed, “Oh, nobody! I’m just here to help out! Klaus is the one you want to talk to, not me, I’m sure.”

Hazel had a fond look in his eye the more she kept talking, “Nobody? Well, I’m sure that’s not true. You said you were here to help out? Elaborate.”

“Well, I help out with the babies. Six is too much for one person, so while Dave is at work, I come over and help Klaus. It gives him some time to paint and gives me something to do during the day! I own a donut shop but I work nights so I get bored sometimes.”

Hazel smiled, “Well that’s very kind.”

Agnes blushed and Hazel turned back to Klaus with a warm smile, “The truth is, I was completely blown away by your work. You really have a great gift. I work for an art distributing company and think they would feel the same way.” He pulled out a business card, “Please contact me if you want to do any more business. I’m sure the price of your work will only grow as time goes on.”

Klaus blinked and took the card, “T-Thank you. Thank you so much. I’ll definitely be in touch.”

“Don’t hesitate to call,” He looked to Agnes as he said, “about anything.”

“Of course,” Klaus stammered, “Thank you so much.”

Hazel winked and walked off.

“Babe,” Klaus turned to Dave, “We are gonna be rich.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woooooo! sorry for the lack of baby times in this chapter lol next one will be pure baby fun! thank you all so much for reading this! All of your comments really do make me so happy! Also!!! i have a tumblr lol ive had it for yeeeaars but never did anything on it except reblog memes and stuff lmaooo but now im trying to make it a tua blog and actually post stuff and be interactive!! im gonna post about my fics and stuff so pls hmu lol my blog is narwhalnation17


	7. Two Powers. One Day.

The weeks that went by were significantly less stressful after that. The babies were all doing well. Ben’s tentacles had only made two other appearances since last time, and both were handled with minimal panic. It had been a month since the art auction and the time was flying by. The kids were growing up so fast; Luther could somehow already crawl. 

Klaus and Agnes were sitting with the kids in the yard out back. The weather was beautiful. Still warm from summer, but with the cool breeze of fall sweeping around them. The babies loved being outside, the only problem was that they now loved putting everything in their mouths. The adults all had to keep a watchful eye out to make sure that when one of the babies picks up a stick, they don’t start gnawing on it. Agnes seemed to have a hard time concentrating today. Her phone kept chiming with a text, which would prompt her to read it, blush, then quickly type out a response and shove the phone back in her pocket. This cycle continued for about ten minutes before Klaus chimed in.

“Sooooo,” He drawled, “Who ya textin’?”

She blushed deeper, “Oh, it’s silly. I was just talking to Hazel.”

Klaus gaped, “_Hazel?_ As in Rich Art Guy Hazel? As in Suave Sugar Daddy Hazel?”

Agnes blushed even further and lightly smacked his arm, “Oh, stop it! He is not a ‘sugar daddy’! He is just a sweetheart.”

Klaus’ jaw dropped even further, “Oh. My. God. Are you guys dating?”

Her phone chimed again, “No! We are just talking. He’s a nice young man!”

Klaus laughed, “You totally are! How did he even get your number?”

“Well,” she started, “he started coming in to Griddy’s and we started talking. He’s an interesting man! I told him about a bird watching club that I’m in and he wanted to know more about it and so I gave him my number so that I can take him to the next meeting.”

Klaus gasped, “You and Hazel are going on a date!?”

She blushed but her lips formed a small smile, “Just bird watching.”

Klaus rolled his eyes teasingly, “A huh. _Sure_.”

She picked up her phone and giggled at whatever Hazel had sent. Klaus smiled at the scene. Luther chose that moment to begin crawling up onto Klaus’ lap, babbling along as he went.

“Hey buddy,” Klaus smiled and picked the boy up and placed him on his lap. Luther leaned forward and pressed his face into Klaus’ chest to cuddle. Luther loved cuddling. He then leaned back and extended a closed fist forward for Klaus to see.

“What ya got there, Luther?” He asked, unfurling the baby’s hand. Luther smiled softly before showing that he had a large rock hidden in his little fist. 

“Uh oh, we shouldn’t play with rocks, Luther, you can choke on them!” He reached to take the rock out of the baby’s hand, but Luther closed his fist firmly around the rock. There was a loud _CRUNCH_. Luther opened his fist again with a proud smile to reveal nothing but powder left in his hand. 

Klaus’ jaw dropped, “Did-did you just crush that rock?! How is that even possible? It’s-it’s a rock?”

Luther smiled sweetly in response. Klaus blinked several times at the baby in his lap before announcing, “Okay, I need to call Dave. Let’s bring them inside.”

Dave had taken the news of Luther’s super strength surprisingly well and despite the revelation of a new power, the evening went on as usual. Dave came home and they all ate dinner. Agnes left to go to Griddy’s (and to see Hazel). Luther didn’t crush anything with his super strong baby arms. Ben’s tentacles weren’t slithering out of his stomach. Everything was peaceful. 

Klaus was in the kitchen feeding Diego while Dave was getting the rest of the babies settled in to bed. Klaus was bopping Diego around and swaying through the kitchen when he heard Dave scream.

“Dave?” Klaus called out hesitantly. Klaus heard another quick yelp and a crashing noise in response. He cradled Diego in his arms and went over to find Dave. Klaus heard another yell before hearing footsteps pound in his direction. Dave burst into the hallway, eyes frantic.

“_TELEPORTING BABY_.” 

“What?”

“_TELEPORTING BABY!!!!_”

Klaus blinked, “What does-”

Suddenly, a flash of blue light burst in front of their eyes with a _POP!_ They looked down to see little baby Fiero smiling up at them. He giggled at them before he was engulfed by a blue flash again, vanishing before their eyes. Both men yelped and went into panic mode. They both sprinted into every room in the house to try to find where their baby had vanished to. When one man would find him, he would simply poof away in a flash of blue light. Klaus spotted him sprawled out next to the couch, and right before he was able to grab him- _POOF_. He would hear Dave yell “GOT HIM!”, then hear a _POOF_ followed by “DAMNIT!”. Somewhere along the way, Klaus realized that he might be quicker at catching Fiero if he didn’t already have a baby in his arms, so he gently deposited Diego in his crib before frantically sprinting out of the room.

This went on for ten minutes straight before both men were completely out of breath in the living room.

“Okay,” Dave wheezed, “we need to make a plan or something because this is not working.”

“Well, what kind of plan do you make when your baby starts teleporting all over your house?” Klaus managed to say in between gasps.

“I think he thinks this is a game,” Dave starts, “he keeps giggling every time we get close to him.”

“Okay, so maybe we should...stop playing? Like, if we stop rushing at him every time he pops up, he will get bored and stop?”

Dave shrugged, “One way to find out.”

They both settled in on the couch. Klaus bounced his leg anxiously as they heard a poof in the kitchen. Then a poof in their bedroom. Then a poof in the bathroom.

_POOF_

Fiero was sitting in front of them, giggling as happy as can be. The dads smiled at him, but made no move to go to him. Fiero stopped giggling and looked up at them with his large curious eyes.

“Ba.” He declared before teleporting to the other side of the room. The men still smiled at him without getting up. Fiero made a slight pouting face before attempting to crawl over to his dads. Once it was clear that the baby was done teleporting, Dave and Klaus went over to pick him up and give him a big hug.

“You’re our little menace, huh?” Dave asked with a smile and a kiss to his forehead. Fiero’s reply was a small smile and a mischievous glint in his eye. 

“Ohhhhh, yeah. You are going to give us all kinds of trouble, aren’t you, mister?” Klaus joked while tickling the baby’s belly, earning a happy squeal in response. 

“C’mon, let’s get you to bed.” 

And they all settled in for the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyyyyyy im still here lol! sorry for taking forever but this semester is kicking my ass! my updates are probably gonna be slow on my fics, but i swear i will never abandon them. ANYWAYS do yall like it?? let me know what you think of the update!! i love hearing your thoughts!! also hit me up on tumblr lol: narwhalnation17


	8. Birthday Boy

October 1st. Klaus’ 30th birthday and the babies’ first half-birthday. The house was buzzing with excitement, mostly on the part of Klaus and Dave, but still buzzing. Klaus awoke to a peck on his forehead and the smell of waffles permeating the air. 

“Hey, birthday boy,” Dave said low.

Klaus blinked up at him with a smile, “Hey, babe.”

Dave pressed another kiss to the tip of his nose, “Feel old? Mr. Thirty-Year-Old?”

Klaus groaned, “Don’t remind me. My youth is withering away. Next thing you know I’m gonna start graying.”

Dave hummed and pressed another peck to the side of his mouth, “As if you couldn’t rock a look like that.” 

“You’re so right. I think I’ll be a suave old man. Think Jeff Goldblum vibes.”

A kiss to the other side of his mouth, “You’re gonna be much sexier than Jeff Goldblum.”

Klaus smirked, “Is that right?”

A kiss on the chin, “Ohhhh yeah. He’s got nothing on you. We are gonna be two foxy grandpas who _run_ the retirement home. Causing so much trouble.”

Klaus preened, “Can’t wait.”

Dave smiled and pressed a slow and tender kiss to Klaus’ lips.

“Made you some waffles. You better relax and have the chillest birthday morning ever, alright?” 

Klaus nodded. Just then, a baby’s cry could be heard in the other room.

Dave gave another quick kiss to the top of his head, “I’ll get them all ready for the day. Don’t worry about a thing! Love you, birthday boy!”

Klaus smiled sweetly as Dave skipped out the door, “Love you too!”

He settled in to go to work on the mountain of waffles in front of him. Dave had added a copious amount of syrup, strawberries, and chocolate chips to the top, just the way Klaus liked it. He shoveled a bite into his mouth and moaned as the flavor exploded across his taste buds.

They were all going to the zoo today. Klaus was incredibly excited. He loved the zoo. One of his and Dave’s first ‘real’ dates had been to the zoo. He was also excited to see all of the kids’ reactions to the animals. He couldn’t believe they were already six months old! He felt like he just got them yesterday! Not _three months_ ago! He loved every minute of it. Sure, the sleep deprivation was not fun and sure, the whole ‘super poweredness’ made things a little more complicated, but he wouldn’t change a thing. Luther liked to proudly crawl around and crush things with his chubby little hands, making Dave and Klaus smile fondly -granted whatever he just crushed wasn’t important. Fierro still loved to play tag with his teleportation powers, giving the dads a good laugh. Ben’s stomach aches had gotten under control. It seems like he was no longer trying to keep the tentacles inside. Sometimes, when he would get excited, he would squeal and the tentacles would burst from him and start wiggling around in happiness. Thankfully, that had never happened in public, so it was a happy- albeit slightly terrifying- ordeal. Overall, everything was under control. He and Dave liked to theorize what powers the other kids could have. Of course, there was no way of knowing, but it was still fun to think of all the possibilities. 

Klaus finished licking all remaining syrup off his plate and sauntered into the kitchen. He entered to see that Dave had gotten all of the babies in their high chairs and was beginning to feed them. He looked up as Klaus entered.

“Babe! You are supposed to be relaxing!”

Klaus shrugged with a grin, “Got bored. I figured I _guess_ I could hang out with my family.”

Dave grinned back. Klaus walked over and pressed a kiss to each baby’s forehead. 

“Six months old. Can you believe it?” Klaus asked as he patted Vanya’s head.

“Next thing you know, they’ll be heading off to college!” 

Klaus smacked him on the shoulder, “Don’t make me think about that! They are gonna be here with us forever! Isn’t that right, Vanya?” 

“Babababa!” she enthusiastically replied.

Klaus pointed, “See! She gets me!”

“Can’t argue with that.” Dave said with a grin.

Klaus laughed and began to rinse off his plate, when suddenly his phone started ringing. He pulled it out and checked the caller ID. 

**Private Number**

He shrugged and hit answer, “Hello?”

“Klaus.”

He felt himself go cold.

“...Dad?”

Dave froze out of the corner of his eye.

Klaus heard Reginald grunt on the other end of the line. Klaus swallowed, “Wh-?”

Reginald’s gruff voice cut him off.

“The children are now six months of age. I need to know about their development.”

Klaus’ brows furrowed, “Their development? Uh, they are doing fine...I don’t-”

Reginald sighed and it made Klaus feel deflated, “Surely their powers must have manifested by now.”

Klaus felt his mouth go dry, “P-powers?” He looked to Dave who’s eyes grew wide.

“Yes, boy. Their powers. If my calculations are correct, they should have begun to manifest by now. It is imperative that I know about any progress that is made.”

Klaus licked his lips, “Why would you need to know?”

“Only I am capable of getting these children to reach their full potential. They are meant for far greater things than playing house with you.”

Klaus’ fear morphed into a deep, deep anger. How _dare_ he think he is entitled to know anything about them? How _dare_ he say that being happy here with him wasn’t great? Being their father is the greatest thing that Klaus had ever done and Reginald thinks he can make it seem worthless? Klaus was nearly vibrating with rage as he bit out a response, “They are happy here with me. I don’t owe you _shit_. These are _my_ kids and you don’t get to know _anything_ about them. Fuck off and don’t call me again.”

“Kl-” Klaus hung up the phone before he could say another word. Dave strode over and looked at his husband cautiously.

“Are you alright?”

Klaus grit his teeth, “He doesn’t get to call and ask about them. I don’t care if he thinks he can do something with their powers, _he doesn’t get to_.”

Dave nodded and gestured to the phone, “Can I see that?”

Klaus handed it over and Dave quickly blocked the number. 

“Now he can’t call you again. He won’t go anywhere near the kids. Everything is going to be okay, okay?”

Klaus closed his eyes and took a shaky breath. Leave it to Reginald to pop up and ruin a perfect day. But he wasn’t here. Klaus and his family were here. His true family. And they were going to have a great day. He opened his eyes and nodded. Dave squeezed his shoulders.

“Okay.” 

Together, they finished getting the children all set up for the day and tried to get Reginald off their minds. They saddled them into their strollers and set off. The kids were all decked out in cute fall onesies. The dads had brought little heart-shaped sunglasses for them in case it was too bright. Klaus was sporting his favorite long black skirt with a purple and blue tye dye cropped hoodie. Dave was wearing a Hawaiian print shirt with a denim jacket and black pants. A true fashionable squad.

They strolled up to the zoo and made their way inside. The first exhibit was the ‘Arctic Zone’ complete with polar bears, penguins, and seals. Diego seemed to love the penguins and would giggle and shriek whenever one would come near the glass. 

After that, they strolled the kids to the monkey exhibit. One very curious monkey made its way over to the barrier between them and stared curiously at the Katzes. The babies all stared back. The monkey then made a small grunting noise at them.

“Ooo.” 

Fierro tilted his head to the side and said, “Ooo.” back. The monkey blinked and repeated, “Ooo,” more confidently. This caused Fierro to reply with an excited smile, “Ooo!”. 

The monkey jerked excitedly, “Ooo!”

Diego joined Fierro in yelling, “Ooo!”

“Ooo!”

All of the babies in unison cheered, “Ooo!”

An excited jump, “Ooo! Ooo!”

The babies had started giggling with extreme happiness and all shouting at random intervals, “Ooo! Ooo! Ooo! Ooo!”

This went on for about ten minutes until Dave and Klaus (after whipping out their phones to take videos) decided that they should go or else they would be standing there forever. As they walked away, the babies continued to “OOO!” at each other.

“This is going to go on all day, isn’t it?” Dave laughed.

Klaus simply replied with, “Ooo!”

They then made their way to the aquarium exhibit. The children seemed absolutely fascinated with all of the sea life around them. They entered into an area of the exhibit that was structured like a dome. It was as if they were in a bubble at the bottom of the sea, looking up and seeing the creatures all around them. 

Ben had his eyes trained on one critter like a hawk. The creature seemed to be a type of octopus and was gracefully swimming around near the glass. Ben was completely mesmerized by it and wouldn’t look at anything else. 

Klaus scooped him up in his arms, “You like that, Benny?”

Ben blinked in response. There was a stand with brief descriptions of all the animals in the exhibit in front of one spot of the glass. Klaus sauntered over to it to see more.

“Oh, lookie here, Benny! This says that that is a Day Octopus. It can change its skin to look like coral! Pretty cool, right?”

Ben simply continued staring at the octopus. Klaus bopped them closer to the glass and watched as Ben’s face slowly formed a smile. The smile turned into a grin, then a giggle. At once he erupted in an excited screech and his own tentacles suddenly shot out of his body. Klaus yelped and gripped on tight as the tentacles waved all around the room. Ben’s tentacles were moving as if they were dancing. Ben was laughing and the octopus inside the aquarium was looking right at him, wiggling its own tentacles in a similar manner.

“_Klaus!_” Dave yelped. Klaus turned around to see Dave narrowly dodging a rogue tentacle. 

“What should we do?” Klaus yelled back. Thankfully they were the only ones in this part of the exhibit, but anyone could walk in at any moment! They had to get Ben to reel in his tentacles before someone comes in.

“Try to get him calm!” Dave was trying to protect the babies from the wiggling tentacles, but the babies did not seem concerned with the situation at all. In fact, they were all giggling and cheering at the sight.

“Uhhh” How should he do that? Maybe get him away from the octopus? Klaus slowly started backing away from the glass. As the distance grew, Ben started reaching forward, making grabby hands towards the octopus. His tentacles began exploring the glass as if trying to find a way to reach in and touch it. 

“Ben? Hey, Benny, look at me.” Klaus pet the top of his head soothingly, “Look at me, sweetheart. I’m happy you made a friend but I need you to look at me.” Ben glanced at him before continuing to look longingly at the octopus. “Come on, Ben. I know that octopus is super cool, just like you! But you have to put the tentacles away for now. You can let them loose when we get home but we are in public and a lot of people aren’t used to someone as cool as you! I promise we can do this later, see-” Klaus began wiggling his free arm almost like a tentacle, “-I can do it too! We can all have fun, but at _home_. It will be a blast! I promise!” Klaus continued flopping his arm around and dancing with Ben in his arms. Sure enough, Ben began paying more attention to Klaus than the octopus. His tentacles slowly began to stop waving around the room and instead began to engulf Klaus in an embrace as if they were hugging him. 

“Okay, I can work with this!” Klaus laughed. He continued to sway to an unheard beat. Ben continued to laugh and his tentacles continued to wrap Klaus in a hug. Klaus made eye contact with Dave who was smiling fondly at the two. 

“I love you,” Dave breathed.

Klaus felt his face flush, “Obviously.”

They laughed and Klaus continued to dance around the room.

“Guess we should have seen that coming, huh?.” Klaus said with a smile.

Dave grinned, “Live and learn, I guess. At least now we have a tentacle-dance party to look forward to.”

Dave stepped forward and pressed a kiss into the top of Ben’s head. Ben giggled and some of the tentacles moved to embrace Dave as well. They stood in a warm hug for a few moments, happy and content. The tentacles eventually began to retreat back into Ben. He looked up at them and announced, “Dada!”

Both men gasped.

“He said dada! Oh my gosh! He said his first words!”

“Dada!” Ben repeated with a warm smile.

“That’s us! We’re dadas!”

“Dadas!”

“Oh my god!”

“Dada!”

“Ahhh!!”

That moment was definitely the highlight of their day. The whole family had a complete blast at the zoo. Diego loved the penguins, Fierro loved the monkeys, and Ben loved the octopus. Allison seemed particularly fond of flamingos. Luther stared in fascination at the elephants. And Vanya was mesmerized by all of the other exotic birds and would sway to the sound of their chirpings. By the time they had seen everything, the dads were exhausted but content. 

“Did you have a good birthday, love?”

“The best.” Klaus said with a kiss.

“Come on, we have a tentacle dance party to finish.”

And the kids made monkey noises the whole way home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me, writing an entire section about the babies trying to have a conversation with a monkey: is this stupid?  
also me: yes but it's also cute so too bad
> 
> wooooohooooo!! hope you all enjoyed! let me know what you think!!!


	9. Baby Mutiny

Klaus hummed along to the song “Your Welcome” from Moana as he poured some homemade chicken noodle soup into a bowl. He and Dave had begun to play Disney movies for the kids. The kids didn’t care for the movies at all, but they _loved_ all the songs. Like now, they were currently all crawling around Klaus’ feet, all making noises that did not resemble the song at all, but the babies seemed pleased to think that they were singing. 

Klaus set the bowl of soup on a tray, along with a cup of tea, and looked down at the sea of babies below him.

“Alright, kiddos! You stay here while I take care of your poor sick dad.”

He received a series of babbling noises in return. He stepped over the pile of babies and started to make his way to Dave.

He knocked softly on their bedroom door and stepped inside. Dave was laying in bed looking very tired, but he smiled when Klaus walked in.

“Hey, love.” Dave said.

“Hey, sweetheart. How are you feeling?”

“A lot better than earlier, that’s for sure. Mostly just bored.”

Dave had contracted strep throat as was feeling _terrible_ for a few days. Thankfully, they saw a doctor and he was put on antibiotics to make him better, but he still wasn’t feeling 100%. Klaus wanted to just wrap him up and take away all his pain. Klaus had barely had a moment with Dave the past few days, as he was taking care of the babies and trying to keep them from their then-contagious Dad. He was exhausted and stressed, but his only worry was how to make Dave feel better and how to keep his babies happy.

Klaus pressed a kiss to the top of his head. Dave smiled up at him and spoke up. 

“I’ve just been staring out this window all day. I think the Patches got a new car.”

Klaus laughed, “Oh, yeah?” He peeked out the window to see a black van parked on the road in between their house and their next door neighbors’, the Patches, house. The windows were too dark to see inside. 

“Kinda a creepy looking car. Doesn’t look like their style.” Klaus mused.

Dave shrugged, “It’s been sitting there for a few days. They do have a baby, and I know she’s pregnant with another. Maybe they figured an ugly van was the way to go.” He laughed, “Hell, maybe we should get one too.”

“If we get a van like that I will 100% paint it to look like Scooby Doo’s mystery mobile.”

Dave grinned, “I wouldn’t expect anything less.”

Klaus smiled warmly and declared, “I come bearing gifts!”

He set the tray on the top of Dave’s lap gently.

“Now, you eat up. Soup heals the soul you know.”

Dave smiled, “Is that right?”

Klaus grinned and pronounced, “I declare it so!” He then leaned forward and gave Dave another motherly kiss on the forehead. Dave playfully shoved him.

“_Klaus!_ I’m sick! I don’t want you to catch it too!”

Klaus hummed, “_Actually,_ Davey-boy, you aren’t contagious anymore. You’ve been on the antibiotics over 24 hours and the doc said after that, you can’t spread it. That means I can give you all the healing smooches you deserve!” To prove his point, he gave Dave another tender kiss, right on his lips. Dave smiled into it. When they broke apart they took a moment to look into each other’s eyes and smile. 

The moment was interrupted by a crashing sound from the hallway. Klaus quickly gave Dave another kiss to the top of his head then cheered, “Gotta run, babe! You rest up. Dr. Klaus’ orders!”

“Yes, sir.” Dave smiled as Klaus skid out of the room.

Klaus closed the bedroom door and emerged to see all of the babies blinking innocently up at him. Their innocence was betrayed by the fact that the lamp behind them was off the side table and shattered on the ground. 

“Aw, c’mon guys. I leave you alone for five seconds and you cause this mess! There’s glass everywhere, you could have gotten hurt!” Klaus said in a pretend-stern voice. It was hard to actually be stern with a group of adorable babies blinking up at you.

“Mmmmmmaaaa.” Allison babbled.

Klaus gave her a look, “Ahuh, _sure_. Likely story.”

She drooled in response. Klaus went over to pick up the pieces of the lamp, while keeping an eye on the children to make sure they don’t come near. He quickly cleared the area and threw the pieces away. When he came back, all of the babies were sat outside his and Dave’s bedroom and blinking up at the door expectantly.

“Um, babies? Watchya doin’?”

Luther looked at him and reached for the door in a grabby motion, “Buh.”

Klaus approached the group and more babies started to look at him and reach for the door expectantly.

“Dada!” Ben declared while pointing at the door.

“Bababababababababa-” Allison carried on as she bounced around excitedly as she looked at Klaus.

“Uunnnnnnnngh,” complained Fierro as he made grabby hands at the door.

“Dadadadadada!” Vanya babbled (She had successfully said “dada” earlier this week and hasn’t been able to stop saying it since).

Diego’s voice was muffled by the pacifier in his mouth, but he was making a very firm “Mmmmmmmm!” noise at Klaus.

Luther pouted at him and softly said, “Buh,” again.

Klaus stepped over the babies and plopped down to sit in front of them with his back to the door.

“Okay, kiddos. I know that you all really miss your dad, but he’s sick right now and needs his rest. He will feel better soon and then you all can see him. He’s just sleepy.”

This answer did not seem to satisfy the kids.

“Dada!” Vanya proclaimed as she reached her hand out to the door.

“Yes,” Klaus patiently replied, “Dada is in there, but he is _very_ sleepy.” He closed his eyes and pretended to snore, “Like that, see? Sleepy.”

“Eck!” Fierro demanded with a fierce look on his face.

Klaus looked into the faces of his very pissed babies and decided distraction was his best way out of this, “Hey! How about we watch a movie! What about Winnie the Pooh, all of you like that, right?”

Diego made a disgruntled noise and fell onto his belly. Diego had not yet mastered the art of crawling, so he resolved to kicking his legs wildly and making very angry noises as his attempts to move forward were futile. Unfortunately, Diego had inspired his siblings with his movement. The rest of the babies surged forward. Luther, Allison and Vanya clamored ahead. Thankfully, Ben and Fierro didn’t know how to crawl yet either, but they still tried as they rolled around making frustrated noises. Allison and Vanya crawled onto Klaus’ lap while Luther crawled straight into the door.

“Ah!” Klaus yelped, “Baby mutiny!”

Vanya clumsily grabbed at his knee while babbling a mantra of “Dada dada dada dada.”

Klaus reached over to grab Luther and stop him from ramming his head into the door, but was stopped by a pacifier flying through the air and smacking him directly in the center of his forehead.

“Ow!” He looked up in shock to see Diego grinning devilishly at him, “How did you even _do_ that? You have little baby arms!” Klaus whined. Diego giggled in response.

Allison had pulled herself onto his lap and was grabbing at his shirt. Vanya was situated on his thigh and seemed to be planning her next move. Luther had made it to the door and was patting his hands on it. 

“Okay, hey! I have and idea! I can take you in there one at a time, how about that?” Klaus laughed nervously, "That way Dave can-"

Fierro made an annoyed noise and disappear in a flash of blue.

“Ah! _Super_ baby mutiny!”

Luther smacked the door with a _THWUNK_ causing it to fly off its hinges. Klaus yelped as the babies cheered. Luther, Vanya and Allison surged forward in an excited crawl, paying no heed to the ruined door. 

Klaus looked over to see Ben crying and Diego squirming angrily, both upset to be left out of the fun. Klaus sighed, defeated, and scooped them into his arms.

He entered the room to see Fierro already snuggled with his face in Dave’s neck. Dave was giving him a knowing grin. Luther was using his super strength to climb up the side of the bed as if it were a rock wall. Allison and Vanya were sitting below the bed and making grabby hands up to Dave.

Klaus sighed as he approached his husband, “Sorry, there was a bit of a baby uprising on my hands. I can get them all out if you want.”

Dave smiled warmly and joked, “Can you? You seem a little outnumbered, babe.”

As if in response to the question, Vanya used that moment to scream in frustration, causing the lamp on the bedside table to burst.

“Wow, does she have the ability to break lamps or something?” Klaus joked, “Or maybe we just have bad lamps? It’s really hard to tell what’s a coincidence and what could be a power of theirs. Like Diego’s weird baby arm! But there totally was a broken lamp in the hallway and I feel like things have been breaking a lot lately. But that could also be because there are six babies in the house who are very clumsy and bump into things. There's also me who is equally as clumsy. And, Dave, you're pretty clumsy yourself! Anyways, I can totally take care of it, get you some rest. I was slightly unprepared for a power fueled baby uprising, but now I’ll be ready for it. These kiddos ain’t outsmarting me! So, I’m sorry if they bothered you or- Oh god, were you asleep?! What if we woke you up! I’m so sorry, Dave! You are supposed to be getting better and I can’t even-”

“Babe.”

Klaus adjusted the babies on his hips and looked up at Dave, “Yeah?”

Dave had a smile on his face but his eyebrows were furrowed, “Why don’t you come and relax with me? I’m in the mood for a snuggle puddle with the love of my life and our beautiful babies.”

Klaus blushed but asked, “Are you sure you don’t need rest? I can take care of everything, you don’t have to worry about me. I can take the babies to the park or something! Or I can call Agnes, or--”

“Sweetheart,” Dave laughed, “I’m _fine_. I have done enough resting this week to last me a lifetime. It’s _you_ that needs some rest. Come on in.”

Klaus smiled and gave a soft, “Okay.”

Luther had successfully crawled up the bed and had settled for hugging Dave’s belly. Klaus set Ben and Diego on the bed, and quickly followed it up by picking up Allison and Vanya and settling them in as well. Klaus crawled under the covers and let the babies find a good spot around them. Fierro had already fallen asleep with his face pressed in the crook of Dave’s neck. Vanya curled up on top of Dave’s chest and Luther continued to hug into Dave’s stomach. Allison had crawled up to lay with her head below Klaus’ chin. Diego was star-fished on Klaus’ stomach and Ben was clinging to Klaus’ arm like a koala. Klaus used his free hand to grab Dave’s and pressed a gentle kiss to the top of his knuckles.

Dave giggled and Klaus smiled.

“Get some rest,” Klaus whispered with another kiss to Dave’s hand, “I love you so much.” 

“Love you too, honey,” Dave said with a sleepy smile.

And they all fell asleep in the snuggle puddle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yayyyy i hope you enjoyed! Also!! If anyone has fun or cute suggestions of things for the gang to do in upcoming chapters, comment and let me know! I know overall what I want to happen, but all the cute excursions in between are very open haha. I'm totally open to suggestions!! Thanks for reading!!


End file.
